2008 Beijing Olympics Elimination Bracket: The Succulent 16

The votes came in, and the votes have been counted. Click on the image below to see where we’re at in the bracket.


Not a whole lot of surprises in the first round, most matches went according to seeding. The only upsets were a couple 5 over 4 seeds (#5 Rowing over #4 Field Hockey; and #5 Taekwondo over #4 Cycling), and the biggest upset being #6 Table Tennis over #3 Boxing. I can’t say that last one was too surprising. And, of course, with any bracket, there was a little bit of controversy over seeding – the Hairy Guate was adamant that weightlifting deserved much more than a #7 seed, and that #2 Wrestling deserved an easier bracket than the Basketball region. What can I say - When in Rome…. Voting on this round closes Sunday at 10 p.m. PT. So without further ado, here’s your Succulent 16:

Basketball Region

#1 Basketball v. #4 Synchronized Swimming
The girls of makeup and gelatin hair may have gotten past Judo with relative ease, but they’re going to have their hands full with LeBron, Kobe, & Co.




#3 Soccer v. #2 Wrestling
Interesting match-up here – you have the most popular sport in the world up against one of the oldest sports in the world. And in both sports, you gotta watch out for your nuts.




Swimming Region

#1 Swimming v. #5 Rowing
Field Hockey didn’t put up much of a fight against Rowing last round. We’ll see if Rowing can keep that momentum up against Amanda Beard and her Playboy spread.



#6 Table Tennis v. #2 Diving
Table Tennis flat out EMBARRASSED Boxing in the first round. Was it luck, or can the Masters of the Paddle keep the magic alive? I’m thinking we have a real darkhorse to challenge for the title here.



Gymnastics Region

#1 Gymnastics v. #5 Taekwondo
I admit. I once had a crush on Dominique Moceanu. Don’t leave me hanging here, though, admit it – you did, too. But aside from that, I don’t think Taekwondo likes this matchup. I mean, have you seen a gymnast’s legs? They’re freakin’ TREE TRUNKS! Imagine getting Cro-Cop’d by those logs.



#3 Baseball v. #2 Beach Volleyball
Do the Boys of Summer have it in them to beat the Girls of Sun and Sand…did I mention bikinis?



Track and Field Region

#1 Track and Field v. #4 Triathlon
COUGH * COUGH * COUGH…Beijing * COUGH * pollution * COUGH * SUCKS!!!



#3 Volleyball v. #2 Softball
The Battle of the Camel Toes. C’mon, you know what I’m talking about.