2008 Beijing Olympics Elimination Bracket: The Edible Eight

Things are heating up as we move on to the Edible Eight. Click on the image below to see how things stand:

The first thing you'll probably notice is that #4 Synchronized Swimming pulled the biggest upset of the tournament, bouncing the overall #1 seed Basketball from the competition. I think Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, and Larry Bird all turned over in their proverbial graves that have yet to be created. But that wasn't the only big upset in the Succulent 16. #6 Table Tennis ping'd and pong'd it's way right past diving and into a quarterfinal match-up against #1 Swimming. Besides #3 Volleyball getting the kill against #2 Softball, all other matches went according to seeding. So here we go, the Edible Eight!

#4 Synchronized Swimming v. #3 Soccer
If basketball couldn't slow these girls down, I'm not sure any sport in this competition can - with perhaps the exception of Table Tennis. No strangers to trash talk, those synchronized swimmers were heard singing, "HEY BASKETBALL - TELL ME HOW MY ASS TASTES!"



#1 Swimming v. #6 Table Tennis
OK, so get this - the Olympics are in Beijing, right? Remember in Forrest Gump, when Forrest started kicking some ping-pong butt? Remember when he said "I just loved playing ping-pong with my Flexolite ping pong paddle"? Do you also remember that he played on the All-American team...in CHINA! The connection here is as thick as the Beijing pollution. Can Michael Phelps and his chlorine crew hold off the spirit of Forrest Gump?


#1 Gymnastics v. #2 Beach Volleyball
I've gotta be honest, I'm drawing a blank here - I've got nothing funny or witty to contribute. I could resort to some sexual innuendo, but most of the girls involved in gymnastics are underage, and I'd feel just dirty. Here's a picture of a cute puppy instead.



#1 Track and Field v. #3 Volleyball
Remember Dan and Dave? They made those commercials for Reebok and started a national debate over which one would get the Gold and which one would settle for Silver. Dan and Dave were the shizzle before Snoop Dogg taught us that everything sounds cooler if it ends in "-izzle." But then the unthinkable happened - Dan failed to qualify for the 1992 Olympics. On the bright side, Dave would go on to blow past the competition as expected and win the Gold.

Wait, what's that? He didn't win the Gold? He got the Bronze? Oh. That sucks.




Voting closes on Wednesday night at Midnight.

The Dodgers Can’t Get a Hit – But Win

Hits are overrated. At least that’s what the Dodgers are telling themselves tonight. Despite being no-hit for 8 innings, they walked away with a 1-0 win over the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim at home on Saturday.

The Dodgers got a baserunner in the 5th when Jered Weaver couldn’t field a soft grounder from Matt Kemp. Kemp promptly stole second, and then helped himself to third base after Jeff Mathis air mailed a throw into centerfield. Kemp then made it home on a sacrifice fly from Blake DeWitt for the only run of the game.

Jered Weaver pitched 6 no-hit innings, and Jose Arredondo closed it out with 2 hitless innings. But it was Chad Billingsley who picked up the win for the Dodgers.

My question – why not leave Jered Weaver out to finish the job? I know his pitch count was high, and I know they were playing by NL rules, meaning Weaver would have to hit. But so what if the Halo’s lose this game 1-0? I mean, sure, it would suck, and I don’t generally advocate individual accomplishments at the expense of your team. But it’s a NO-HITTER!! Not to mention the fact that Weaver has been struggling this year; imagine what a no-hitter would do for the guy’s confidence, win or lose.

Top 10 Beer Commercials

We're taking a break from the usual sports blogging to bring the Muffin's Top 10 Beer commercials. If only Budweiser made beer as well as they make commercials

10. Heineken. I think I'd make the same choice.


9. Budweiser. This video was funny at first. Then it got annoying. Now that it's been a while, it's funny again.



8. Carlton Draught. This ad is freakin' huge.


7. Tiger. Beer worth dying for.


6. Bud Light. Ouch.


5. Bud Light. Made with delicious alcohol.


4. Rolling Rock. I wonder if you can book the Beer Ape for parties.

3. Molson Canadian. Once I'm done writing this list, I'm moving to Canada.


2. Bud Light. *BLEEP*in' awesome.


1. Birra Moretti Zero. From Italy.

UFC 86 Preview and Predictions

We here at the Muffin do previews better than anyone because we provide hard hitting in your face analysis and pure comedy. So without further ado here is a complete walk through of every fight on the UFC 86 card.

Corey Hill Vs. Justin Buchholz
-Everyone remember Corey hill from TUF last season? He claimed to have fought in MMA prior to trying out for the show...a lie. Yet Dana kept him around and he showed a lot of promise on the show. I think this is primarily due to his build. At 6 foot 4 inches 155 pounds you are practically a Somalian on the commercials with Dikembe Mutombo. Bucholz is coming off a loss to Matt "I just won the fight of my life" Wiman via submission and I do not see Bucholz being able to match Corey's size or hands.

I go with Hill first round knockout.

Melvin Guillard Vs. Dennis Siver
Melvin makes his return to the Octagon after a long layoff since December in which Rich Clementi showed some great jujitsu and got Melvin in a very bad choke. Melvin is kind of like a box of chocolates...are you going to get the man with hands that can knock you senseless or are you going to get the melvin who falls down either gets choked out or swept into a bad position to be submitted there.

Siver posses some problems for Melvin in the fact that he can actually apply a submission and has never been knocked out. Gray Maynard grinded out a decision on him recently, but his UFC record is 1 and 2 he probably realizes without a win he is gone.

I'll take Siver in this via Melvin swinging for the fences, getting caught in a nasty armbar and being forced to have some cocaine post fight.

Jorge Gurgel Vs. Cole Miller
What a shame this fight is not on TV. The Muffin hates Gurgel! We ourselves remember Alvin Robinson taking 15 minutes and pounding Jorge's face in. Jorge might be the most overrated guy in the UFC. Sadly I do not think Cole Miller will finish Jorge via pounding on his face instead he will submit him. Cole is coming off a TKO and has something to prove. He is a submission specialist and has a huge heigh advantage here. I expect him to push Jorge around the ring for a bit, take top position and eventually get himself into position for an armbar.

Gabriel Gonzaga Vs. Justin McCully
Gabriel Gonzaga makes the return to the ring after getting run over by freight train in Fabricio Werdum. Gabe has had a rough go lately...Randy Couture broke his nose in the title match and then he got knocked senseless by Werdum. Gabe has excellent Jujitsu and his stand up isnt half bad either. Everyone remembers that head kick knockout to Cro Cop like it was yesterday...but me I was drunk. Anyway Justin McCully has been on the shelf since April of 2007 and lost to Frank Mir. I realize he beat Eddie the Manic Hispanic Sanchez and Hardonk, but there is a HUGE difference between those guys and Gonzaga. I expect Gabe to shake off the cob webs, bring his team out from Massachusetts and lay a beat down via ground and pound on McCully.

Tyson Griffin Vs. Marcus Aurelio
Mr. Fight of the Night Tyson Griffin has been talking trash lately. Claims he deserves a title shot, said that Urijah Faber wanted nothing to do with him again, but you gotta respect this kid. Besides his lost to Frankie Edgar he has put on quite a show aganst the likes of Clay Guida, Thiago Tavares and Gleison Tibau. Unfortunately all these have been decisions and I do not think Marcus Aurelio will be able to hang with Griffin. Griffin first round knockout.

Josh Koscheck Vs. Chris Lytle
Lights Out Lytle brings his great submission game against arguably the most improved fighter in the UFC. Koscheck over the last few years has really grown in terms of standup ability and shys away from layin and prayin decisions. Kosh will need to very careful here with Lytle because on the ground Lytle might just pull off one of his great triangle choke arm bar submission combos. However we saw what Hughes did to Lytle last Summer and I expect that to occur here. Koscheck 3 round decision...and for god sakes I hope he doesn't start crying like last time.

Joe Stevenson Vs. Gleison Tibau
Big Daddy comes off the bloodiest battle of his career at the hands of BJ Penn to face a man that Tyson Griffin dominated. I really do not think much needs to be said here. Daddy is the man he has the best choke in all of the UFC and I expect Gleison to be in a world of trouble in this one. First round submission. Maximus is no more after this one.

Patrick Cote Vs. Ricardo Almeida
The Predator has finally revealed himself. He had a rough start in the UFC against Tito Ortiz but has really come along nicely...I feel like he was always on the cusp of getting dropped then would eek out a victory and remain under UFC contract. Well the Cote as of late has been an animal. He knocked out Kendall Grove, Drew McFedries and looks to add one more win before taking on Anderson Silva. How awful will a main event of Anderson Silva Patrick Cote be? Sorry Almeida your submission skills will not even come into play against The Predator. First round knockout for Cote.

Quinton Jackson Vs. Forrest Griffin
AWWOOOOOOO. The most entertaining fighter in all of MMA makes a return since his last victory over Dan Henderson. Hopefully his hand is fully healed because the amount of punches he is going to land should be in the 100s. Forrest thinks his size and speed and footwork are going to really play to his advantage in this fight I disagree. I think the difference maker in this fight is cardio because as much as people believe heart makes a difference when you cant move due to exhaustion who cares. Rampage Jackson has gone five rounds recently and Forrest looked gas'd against Shogun. Also Shogun even admitted he had little to no gameplan when taking on Forrest and it showed. He was sloppy, tired and most likely was off the roids he used to take in Pride. The people wanted this fight and they'll get it. I think it goes 5 rounds with Rampage Jackson taking rounds 1,3,4 and 5 and Forrest taking Round 2 with his "good footwork".

Bulgarian Weightlifters Eat Steroids for Breakfast, Lunch & Dinner

According to ESPN, the Bulgarian weightlifting team has been withdrawn from the 2008 Olympics in Beijing. This comes after 11 Bulgarian weightlifters tested positive for banned substances (SHOCK!).

Our sources tell us they drowned their sorrows in Jaeger Bombs...but not until they all got new haircuts.

2008 Beijing Olympics Elimination Bracket: The Succulent 16

The votes came in, and the votes have been counted. Click on the image below to see where we’re at in the bracket.


Not a whole lot of surprises in the first round, most matches went according to seeding. The only upsets were a couple 5 over 4 seeds (#5 Rowing over #4 Field Hockey; and #5 Taekwondo over #4 Cycling), and the biggest upset being #6 Table Tennis over #3 Boxing. I can’t say that last one was too surprising. And, of course, with any bracket, there was a little bit of controversy over seeding – the Hairy Guate was adamant that weightlifting deserved much more than a #7 seed, and that #2 Wrestling deserved an easier bracket than the Basketball region. What can I say - When in Rome…. Voting on this round closes Sunday at 10 p.m. PT. So without further ado, here’s your Succulent 16:

Basketball Region

#1 Basketball v. #4 Synchronized Swimming
The girls of makeup and gelatin hair may have gotten past Judo with relative ease, but they’re going to have their hands full with LeBron, Kobe, & Co.




#3 Soccer v. #2 Wrestling
Interesting match-up here – you have the most popular sport in the world up against one of the oldest sports in the world. And in both sports, you gotta watch out for your nuts.




Swimming Region

#1 Swimming v. #5 Rowing
Field Hockey didn’t put up much of a fight against Rowing last round. We’ll see if Rowing can keep that momentum up against Amanda Beard and her Playboy spread.



#6 Table Tennis v. #2 Diving
Table Tennis flat out EMBARRASSED Boxing in the first round. Was it luck, or can the Masters of the Paddle keep the magic alive? I’m thinking we have a real darkhorse to challenge for the title here.



Gymnastics Region

#1 Gymnastics v. #5 Taekwondo
I admit. I once had a crush on Dominique Moceanu. Don’t leave me hanging here, though, admit it – you did, too. But aside from that, I don’t think Taekwondo likes this matchup. I mean, have you seen a gymnast’s legs? They’re freakin’ TREE TRUNKS! Imagine getting Cro-Cop’d by those logs.



#3 Baseball v. #2 Beach Volleyball
Do the Boys of Summer have it in them to beat the Girls of Sun and Sand…did I mention bikinis?



Track and Field Region

#1 Track and Field v. #4 Triathlon
COUGH * COUGH * COUGH…Beijing * COUGH * pollution * COUGH * SUCKS!!!



#3 Volleyball v. #2 Softball
The Battle of the Camel Toes. C’mon, you know what I’m talking about.

Will This Guy Be in Beijing?

Some video evidence why you should (or maybe should not) vote for Diving in The Sports Muffin's 2008 Beijing Olympics Elimination Bracket.

Vote here!
http://www.thesportsmuffin.com/2008/06/sports-muffin-presents-2008-beijing.html

NL MVP

So far the NL is stacked with candidates for MVP. Tough decisions to be made here, but the Hairy Guate is gonna take a stab at it.

1. Chase Utley (Phi), .291 BA, 22 HR, 63 RBI, 57 R
Has slowed down a bit after an absolutely MONSTER start. Gets the slight nod over Lance Berkman of the Astros only because Utley is leading his team towards a division title and the Astros have an uphill battle to get into the playoffs.

2. Lance Berkman (HOU), .354 BA, 20 HR, 60 RBI, 1.121 OPS, 12 SB
Lance is putting up ridiculous numbers this year. If he played on a winning team he'd be a lock at the halfway point. Who looks and Lance Berkman and thinks 12 SB halfway through the year? He's a Chipper Jones injury away from being a Triple Crown candidate.

3. Chipper Jones (ATL), .393 BA, 16 HR, 46 RBI, 1.116 OPS, 46 BB
As a lifelong ATL/Chipper fan I would love to see him get MVP number 2 on his way to Championship number 2. Injuries to both Chipper and the entire Braves pitching staff are probably going to prevent this unfortunately. By posting these kinds of numbers this late in his career he is solidifying his place in Cooperstown.

4. Albert Pujols (STL), .347 BA, 16 HR, 42 RBI, 1.105 OPS, 52 BB
Albert is basically a lock for this list every year. He's leading what seems to be an overachieving team at this point. If the Cards keep this up don't be surprised if he leap frogs the top 3. The only thing that will hold him back are nagging injuries. An unhealthy Albert is still a hell of a lot better than most everyone else.

5a. Aramis Ramirez (CHC), .299 BA, 14 HR, 53 RBI, 41 BB
5b. Derek Lee (CHC), .294 BA, 15 HR, 48 RBI
Best team in MLB should have at least some representation on this list. Ramirez and Lee are posting very similar numbers and if either goes on a tear in the second half Cubs fans can rightfully chant MVP! MVP! during the postseason.

Honorable Mention: Ryan Braun, Adrian Gonzalez, Dan Uggla, Matt Holiday

AL MVP Talk in June

Yet another worthless mid-season list. But it's from the Muffin so read up, it's good for you. On to the AL MVP candidates:

1a. Josh Hamilton (TEX), .311 average, 19 HR, 76 RBI, 50 R
1b. Milton Bradley (TEX), .332 average, 15 HR, 48 RBI, 47 R, ML-leading .452 OBP and 1.079 OPS
1c. Ian Kinsler (TEX), .305 average, 12 HR, 47 RBI, 64 R, 19 SB

I saw the Hairy Guate implement the "#a" and "#b" strategy yesterday when putting together the NL Cy Young list. I'm going to steal that idea to pick a few teammates here. While everyone goes on and on about Hamilton's numbers (and they should), many seem to overlook the guys setting the table. Still, I give Hamilton the nod because of the absurd amount of RBI he has to this point. Besides, the Rangers likely aren't making the playoffs, so they're gonna need someone with eye-popping numbers a-la Alex Rodriguez in 2003 to bring home the hardware.

4. Alex Rodriguez (NYY), .332 average, 14 HR, 41 RBI, 40 R, 9 SB
There seems to be less focus on A-Rod this year, which probably has a lot to do with the fact that he didn't start on the torrid pace he did last year, and the Yankees struggles up to this point. But those numbers are still very impressive, and if the Yankees make a playoff run, A-Rod will be at the forefront. (I already filled my teammate quota for this list, but Jason "The Mustache" Giambi deserves some recognition - .271 average, 17 HR, 42 RBI, 39 R)

5. Francisco Rodriguez (LAA), 2.06 ERA, 31 saves, 33 K's, 35 IP, 1.17 WHIP
I know, I left him off my AL Cy Young list. But I think putting him on the MVP list is appropriate restitution, don't you? Besides - I'm not a big of relievers winning the Cy Young award, but has any one player been more valuable to the Halos this year than K-Rod? The Angels currently have just a +19 run differential (11th in MLB), yet find themselves 18 games over .500 (1st in MLB). That means the Angels are winning some tight games, and Rodriguez is the one walking the tightrope.

6. Carlos Quentin (CHW), .280 average, 17 HR, 56 RBI, 49 R
Carlos Quentin was the bright spot for an otherwise offensively-challenged ChiSox team to start the 2008 season. Pretty nice pickup for the White Sox seeing as they got the righthander for nothing more than first base prospect Chris Carter. And, no, not the X-Files guy. But a fall back to Earth, as well as the emergence of teammates Joe Crede and Jermaine Dye suggest Quentin may not even be the consensus most valuable player on his own team.

I don't put these guys on the list, mostly because their teams - with the exception of the Red Sox - just aren't good enough to warrant any serious consideration (I know it's an individual award, but that's just how things go). So here they are, the Honorable Mentions: Jose Guillen (.293, 13 HR, 60 RBI), Justin Morneau (.305, 11 HR, 59 RBI), Manny Ramirez (.292, 15 HR, 49 RBI), Kevin Youkilis (.304, 13 HR, 47 RBI), J.D. Drew (.314, 14 HR, 45 RBI), Grady Sizemore (.266, 17 HR, 41 RBI, 17 SB).

The Sports Muffin Presents the 2008 Beijing Olympics Elimination Bracket

We here at the Muffin love elimination brackets. In fact, we don't even like College Basketball - we just like filling out paperwork. That's why you'll find us at the local DMV every weekend. So it seemed only natural that we drop the 2008 Beijing Olympics Elimination Bracket. Click on the image below to see the full bracket:

You'll find the polls for each match-up below. Feel free to vote, and vote often (if you can get around the cookies) - ballot box-stuffing in a Presidential election is a federal offense; it's not on the Muffin. Use any criteria you please. On Friday, we'll reveal the winners and move on to the Succulent 16.

Oh yeah, and to make everything work, we had to give Round One byes to the 1 Seeds (Basketball, Gymnastics, Swimming, and Track and Field). You can rest easy, USA Basketball, no chance for an upset at this time.

Basketball Bracket


#4 Synchronized Swimming v. #5 Judo
On one side, we've got attractive women in swimsuits and Jell-O in their hair (OK, Knox gelatin, if you want to be perfectly accurate). On the other side, we've got what can be considered an up-and-coming sport (though it's been around forever. Literally. God has a black belt). How long until MMA replaces Boxing in the Olympics?


#3 Soccer v. #6 Canoe/Kayak
The Olympics are no World Cup, or even European Cup, as far as soccer is concerned. Still, if you're a fan of the U.S., you've got an exciting team heading in, particularly young phenom Freddy Adu. Canoe/Kayak? To be honest, I'm not sure I could tell you the difference between a canoe and a kayak.


#2 Wrestling v. #7 Weightlifting
The Battle of Steroids! OK, fine, I realize Olympic wrestling is legit. But, seriously, how do the weightlifters pass the tests?


Gymnastics Bracket

#4 Cycling v. #5 Taekwondo
Nothing quite like cycling through thick clouds of pollution. Along the same lines as Judo, Taekwondo could see increased interest following the growing popularity of MMA.


#3 Baseball v. #6 Badminton
I think the real question here is - if David Ortiz were to play in the Olympics, which of these two sports would he compete in? Has anyone ever crossed over two completely different sports in the Olympics before?



#2 Beach Volleyball v. #7 Shooting
One involves bikini-clad women diving in sand. The other is derived from an anti-social activity.


Swimming Bracket

#4 Field Hockey v. #5 Rowing
My only familiarity with Field Hockey comes from watching Winnie Cooper in "The Wonder Years." I know nothing about Rowing, except to know that I couldn't do it.


#3 Boxing v. #6 Table Tennis
I see a real upset happening here. Aren't we over boxing yet? Does anyone care anymore? But Table Tennis! I want to see that on Sportscenter EVERY night. I'm not even kidding. Bring me the nightly Paddle Gems.



#2 Diving v. #7 Sailing
I don't know what's so interesting about diving - maybe it's our fascination with people jumping from high places. Sailing? I'm speechless.



Track and Field Bracket

#4 Triathlon v. #5 Tennis
This could be the worst Olympic year EVER to be a triathlete. How many people run in the triathlon? I have no idea, but let's say 100. How many people do you think will make it through the Beijing pollution? I say anyone smart enough to carry an oxygen tank with them. Tennis isn't as cool as Table Tennis.


#3 Volleyball v. #6 Equestrian
Volleyball - not quite as cool as Beach Volleyball. And Equestrian? Can we just scrap that, and replace it with Horse Racing? After all, the Olympics could seriously use some more gambling-centric sports.


#2 Softball v. #7 Archery
Any sport that involves Jennie Finch is better than a technologically-stunted one like archery (We have guns now - why do we need to shoot sticks using dental floss?) Unless the archers dress up like Robin Hood and his merry men. Then I am TOTALLY watching.

NL Cy Young

The Hairy Guate BRINGS IT with his midseason picks for NL Cy Young...

1. Edinson Volquez (CIN), 10-2, 1.71 ERA, 110 SO, 95.0 IP
Young stud's numbers are even more impressive considering he pitches in a hitters park in Cincy. Who would have thought during the offseason that the Hamilton-Volquez trade could turn out to be an MVP for Cy Young trade?

2. Tim Lincecum (SF), 8-1, 2.54 ERA, 103 SO, 102.2 IP
Another young stud who looks like he'll get his fair share of Cy Youngs when it's all said and done. Has struggled his last couple of outings, but if he can get 16-18 wins playing for the Giants, Cy voters will have to take notice.

3a. Ryan Dempster (CHC), 9-2, 2.63 ERA, 85 SO, 102.2 IP
3b. Carlos Zambrano (CHC), 8-3, 3.13 ERA, 68 SO, 106.1 IP
Dempster gets slight nod over teammate Zambrano as record, ERA, SO are all better. If Cubs continue to have the best record in the league one would think they'll be rewarded with some individual hardware at years end. Either of these two would be worthy.

5. Ben Sheets (MIL), 8-1, 2.74 ERA, 77 SO, 95.1 IP
Brew Crew are hot right now and if Sheets can stay healthy he may have a chance to pitch into October and win a Cy while he's at it.

6. Brandon Webb (ARI), 11-4, 3.40 ERA, 86 SO, 106 IP
Seemed like a lock to get another Cy after his torrid start, but both him and the D-backs have cooled off. He's definitely not out of it by any means though.

Honorable Mention: Cole Hamels, Tim Hudson, Aaron Cook, Kyle Lohse (crazy, I know), Johan (i give up GS to AL pitchers) Santana

AL Cy Young Talk in June

We're coming up on the halfway point of the 2008 MLB Season. Which means you're going to have to endure countless meaningless mid-season lists put together by amateurs who have nothing better to talk about. So without further ado...

AL Cy Young

1. Joe Saunders (LAA), 11-3, 3.03 ERA, 49 K's, 101 IP
The obvious question - can Saunders keep it up? I don't see why not. It's not like he's been fooling hitters with nasty stuff, or blowing anything past them. He's just a solid pitcher who attacks the strike zone and pitches to contact. Plus, he's got arguably the best defense in baseball behind him. He may not even break 100 K's this year, but he's got a real shot at 20 W's.

2. Justin Duchscherer (OAK), 8-4, 1.99 ERA, 51 K's, 77 IP
Duchsch is another guy who came out of virtually nowhere. He was best known for his exceptional work out of the Oakland bullpen, and received the occasional spot start. But an 8-4 record with an ERA below 2 suggests he's more than a spot-starter. Is he legit?

3. Cliff Lee (CLE), 10-1, 2.45 ERA, 79 K's, 95.2 IP
Everyone knows about Cliff Lee, after he put together a 5-0 April with a 0.96 ERA. But things are slowing down a bit ERA-wise, posting a 4.18 ERA in June. Still, he's sporting an impressive 2.45 ERA, and the 10-1 record doesn't leave a whole lot to be desired. I just can't get past Lee's earlier seasons where he was anywhere from mediocre to terrible.

4. Roy Halladay (TOR), 8-6, 2.90 ERA, 93 K's, 114.2 IP
This dude is a workhorse. The record is solid, nothing great - but it's the IP that make Halladay so valuable for the Blue Jays. In fact, all you really need to know is that he's on pace for 10 complete games this year.

5. Felix Hernandez (SEA), 6-5, 2.87 ERA, 91 K's, 103.1 IP
The record isn't all that great, but it's not his fault the Mariners have no offense. Everything else about King Felix looks great - the 2.87 ERA, and 91 K's. He's had some lingering health issues, though, including a collision at the plate today.

6. Ervin Santana (LAA), 9-3, 3.17 ERA, 91 K's, 102.1 IP
Ervin's finally tapped into some of that magic, the magic that had fans and scouts drooling over the young righthander. Despite struggling for a couple years, Santana has done more than hold his own in the Angels rotation. Can he keep it up? He's got nasty stuff, so I say he does.

7. Shaun Marcum (TOR), 5-4, 2.65 ERA, 86 K's, 98.2 IP
Another "out-of-nowhere" guy, Marcum is arguably the best pitcher on the Blue Jay's staff in 2008. The record isn't all that great, but if he can keep his ERA around where it is and continue to strike guys out at his current rate, he should see upwards of 14 or 15 wins if the Jays can get their bats going.

8. John Danks (CHW), 4-4, 2.80 ERA, 66 K's, 86.2 IP
Here's another guy that won't win the Cy Young because of his record. But the ERA is great, and the K's are solid. Above all, though, I need to mention that the Rangers had him. And traded him. Just like they did with Chris Young to the Padres, and Edinson Volquez to the Reds. And, yet, the Texas rotation is led by Vincente Padilla. (In fact, Danks probably belongs in the "honorable mentions" below, but I couldn't help but take a cheap shot at the Rangers.)

For one reason or another, these guys don't make the Cy Young list - mostly because of missed time due to injury. Still, they deserve notice: Scott Kazmir (6-3, 2.03 ERA, 68 K's, 62 IP), C.C. Sabathia (5-8, 4.06 ERA, 107 K's, 106.1 IP), John Lackey (4-1, 1.73 ERA, 39 K's, 52 IP), Rich Harden (4-0, 2.44 ERA, 72 K's, 59 IP)

Putting together these lists takes more time and effort than I thought, so I'll leave the MVP, Rookie of the Year, and Closer awards, as well as all the NL awards, for another time.

Hairy Guate needs help!

OK, Muffin Fans, the Hairy Guate needs your help winning the NBA Mock Draft contest on Yardbarker.com. The victor gets a signed Greg Oden Jersey. Let's just say this prize was destined for me as a lifelong Blazer fan. This jersey would go beautifully with my Clyde the Glyde poster and Arvydas (most underrated player in history) Sabonis jersey. So here is my mock draft as of today. Gimme some input people and help the muffin bring home the bacon.

1. Chicago Bulls: Derrick Rose (PG)-Rose can thank the success of Nash, CP3, Deron Williams.
2. Miami Heat: Michael Beasley (PF)-He has to go number 2, but don't think he'll be a member of the Heat, unless Wade gets traded.
3. Memphis Grizzlies (from Minnesota): OJ Mayo (SG) -Again I think another trade goes down here. Wolves shouldn't give up on Foye yet, Trade down to get Lopez
4. ??? Sonics: Jerryd Bayless (PG) - Seems like consensus pick for Sonics
5. Minnesota Timberwolves: Brook Lopez (C)- Grizz moved up to get Mayo, Wolves pick up Lopez here.
6. New York Knicks: Russell Westbrook (G)- Knicks are a mess, can't afford to gamble here on an Anthony Randolph or Deandre Jordan
7. Los Angeles Clippers: Eric Gordon (SG)- Gotta think Clips wanted UCLA Westbrook here, settle for Gordon.
8. Milwaukee Bucks: Joe Alexander (SF)- After great Madness, seems to be rising on up. Bucks can't gamble two years in a row.
9. Charlotte Bobcats: Deandre Jordan (PF/C)- How can Jordan not pick Jordan? Many seem to think Center here.
10. New Jersey Nets: Danillo Gallinari (SF)- Jefferson seems outta NJ, although not sure if DG is sexy enough for Jay-Z.
11. Golden State Warriors (from Indiana): K-Love (PF)- Warriors trade up to get money outlet passer. Love to Monta all night long!
12. Sacramento Kings: Anthony Randolph (PF)- Kings go with big upside here.
13. Portland Trailblazers: Brandon Rush (SG)- If Blazers keep this pick I like Rush here. Hopefully they don't make rumored Barbosa trade.
14. Indiana Pacers (from Goldent State): DJ Augustin (PG)- Pacers pick up Augustin here after trade with Warriors.

UFC 2009 Video Game Trailer

Here's the latest video game trailer for UFC 2009: Undisputed, set to be released sometime in 2018. For comparison purposes, I've also included the trailer that was released a year or two ago, with Chuck and Rampage. I'm kind of disappointed because I liked the older one better.



And the older one...

The Hungry Actor Breaks the Muffin

This is what happens when the Hungry Actor loses at poker. He sits on chairs and they break. That will teach them to take my money.

Switch-Pitcher

Check out Pat Venditte - he's a "switch-pitcher." A senior at Creighton University, Venditte was drafted by the New York Yankees in the 2008 MLB Draft in the 20th round.

Our sources tell us, that after learning of Venditte's talents, Hank Steinbrenner wants Venditte to join the major league club as soon as possible: "There is no question about it, you don't have a guy who can throw with both arms and keep him in the minors. You just don't do that. You have to be an idiot to do that"



EDIT: Check out this video. Switch-pitcher v. switch-hitter:

Seattle Mariners To Fire Mariner Moose

After a more-than-disappointing start to the 2008 season, the Seattle Mariners are starting to clear house. It all started with the firing of General Manager Bill Bavasi last week. Then the Erik Bedard rumors started swirling, even though just a few months earlier fans and talking heads alike thought he was the key to the AL West crown. Today, the axe fell on manager John McLaren.

But the bloodshed isn't over yet, as the Sports Muffin has received word that, after 18 years in the Pacific Northwest, mascot Mariner Moose is the latest to get the pink slip. Since coming on board in 1990, the Moose was charged with the duty of being "funny, neat and friendly. The Moose [should] show that the Mariners enjoy playing and that they still have a few tricks up their sleeves. It shows they're having fun no matter what the situation." [citation].

The few Seattle management personnel left, who spoke under the condition of anonymity so that they too don't get fired, had this to say: "Quite frankly, the Moose hasn't been doing his job. He's supposed to show that the team is having fun - but they're losing, and losers can't afford to have fun. He's also supposed to show the Mariners have tricks up their sleeves - the only trick Richie Sexson shows is the hat trick at the plate. Besides, mascots are dumb."

No word on whether the Mariners plan on bringing in a replacement.

An Open Letter to Dana White

Dear Dana,

Thank you for being a shrewd business man that squeezes your competition by the balls. A man who makes your competition sit knee deep in red ink due to your no bones about it attitude. You use words like f&*k more than 50 times a minute and can bench 315 pounds, but you know the reason I really love you?

Because you let a company like Affliction buy your prized heavyweights Andrei Arlovski and Tim Sylvia to put on Pay Per View on July 15th. Why do I like this because you baited them into swimming with the sharks. Fine take my prized cattle because I'm a f*&king fight promoter and can create superstars out of people that wear chains around their necks to the ring, do a very odd guitar dance when they win or can not hear at all. You say enjoy trying to get $44.99 from the public because I'll give them what they want....free fights on Spike TV. Not just free fights at that, but the pound for pound best fighter in the world Anderson Silva.

The rumors are that Affliction is expecting 200,000 buys on Pay Per View. But Dana you are too smart for this you know that the last time Fedor was on Pay Per View against Matt Lindland it was purchased by only 6,000 folks. So instead you say enjoy spending $2 fu$%ing million on one fight card, because you wont want to be in this business in six months after I am done with you. You'll hit the gym, bench your 315 pounds, high five Anderson Silva and Brandon Vera and then on July 15th release the hounds.

If Affliction is in the fight business in a year I will grow my hair out....what is left of it.

Mad Love for you Dana White enjoy kicking them in the nuts.

Pelechati

Dana White Interview on Opie and Anthony, 6/18/08

Dana White stops by the Opie and Anthony Show (with lil' Jimmy Norton) and talks UFC and MMA. If only Dana would tell us what he really thinks of guys like Tito Ortiz and Kimbo Slice...

By the way, the expletives are NOT deleted in this one.

EDIT: I got tired of the audio starting automatically every time I went to the home page, so follow this link to listen to the interview. It's nice to have power.

2008 NBA Mock Draft

Below is The Sports Muffin's 2008 NBA Mock Draft.

1. Chicago Bulls Derrick Rose
2. Miami Heat Michael Beasley
3. Minnesota Timberwolves OJ Mayo
4. Seattle SuperSonics Jerryd Bayless
5. Memphis Grizzlies Eric Gordon
6. New York Knicks Anthony Randolph
7. Los Angeles Clippers Kevin Love
8. Milwaukee Bucks Joe Alexander
9. Charlotte Bobcats Brook Lopez
10. New Jersey Nets Danilo Gallinari
11. Indiana Pacers DJ Augustin
12. Sacramento Kings Russell Westbrook
13. Portland Trail Blazers DeAndre Jordan
14. Golden State Warriors Donte Greene

Top 25 College Football Teams for the 2008 Season

Listed below are The Sports Muffin's 2008 Top 25 College Football Teams. This list was compiled using our guest editor Ben Koo's brilliance.

1. Ohio State-

Return 18 starters including a handful of first round draft picks

2. Georgia

Potent offense with Moreno and Stafford coupled with solid defense

3. Florida

The defense is iffy but what teams can realistically outscore an offense with Tebow and Harvin?

4. Missouri

The Big 12 is stacked in 2008, but the Tigers offensive excellence combined with 9 starters returning on the defense, makes them the team to beat.

5. USC

The offense will be better than anticipated, however the defense is going to have to step quickly with Ohio State coming to town in week 3.

6. Oklahoma

The Sooners may field the best offense in the Stoops era, but the defense will have to replace a lot of departing talent

7. West Virginia

The defense is going to give up a lot of points but with all five starters returning on the line Pat White and company maybe able to outscore any team in the nation.

8. Clemson

Handicapping the ACC is quite the challenge. Clemson is one of the best team’s in the county discounting their overhauled offensive line.

9. Wisconsin

The Badgers are going to win often and ugly in 2008 and may contend with the Buckeyes should Allan Evridge develop into a formidable quarterback.

10. Kansas

Experts are overlooking the Jayhawks as if 2007 was a fluke. It wasn’t and 2008 won’t be either.

11. Tennessee

Question marks at quarterback and the defensive front seven, but this year maybe the year Fulmer makes another run at a BSC bowl with a lots of talent returning on offense.

12. Arizona State

The Sun Devils were Jekyll and Hyde in 2007 but look to be the second best team in the Pac 10 with talent and experience at the skills position on offense.

13. BYU

The best non BCS team hails from Utah. I give the nod to BYU over Utah which returns more firepower on offense than their in state rivals.

14. Texas

Texas was a top ten team until Jamaal Charles decided to bolt for the NFL. The Longhorns have the talent to content for the Big 12 South, but will have their hands full with Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, and Texas Tech.

15. Texas Tech

The Red Raiders have flirted with being an upper tier Big 12 team, but may have the talent in place to actually make a run at a Big 12 Championship game. Graham Harrell and Michael Crabtree might shatter the record books in 08, but the Red Raiders will still need to play some defense to compete with Oklahoma and Texas.

16. LSU

The national champs lose a lot of talent to the NFL and have a glaring question mark at the quarterback position. Regardless they will be competitive and could earn their way back into the SEC Championship game.

17. Penn State

Joe Pa’s last harrah? QB play is the one huge question mark with some pretty impressive talent on both sides of the ball.

18. Auburn

Solid QB will put the Tigers in the top 10 but I am not sold on Tony Franklin or Kody Burns just yet.

19. Virginia Tech

The defending conference champs got worked in the Orange Bowl and now have to deal with replacing a hoard of NFL departures. I expect them to take a step back this year, but you would imagine Frank Beamer will have his team in contention to repeat.

20. Illinois

Its hard to handicap Illinois this year with many glaring experience gaps in the starting lineup. Lehman and Mendenhall will be sorely missed but another year of Juice Williams improvement may keep the Illini in contention for the Big Ten.

21. Alabama

One of the most inconsistent teams in 2007, Bama looks to rally around John Parker Wilson and a stellar offensive line in hopes of competing with the upper eshelon of the SEC.

22. Oregon

The Ducks will take a big step back this year with Dixon and Stewart gone to the NFL. However Mike Belotti maybe the most underrated coach in the country and has some premier talent at receiver, defensive line, and offensive line to rebuild with.

23. USF

The defense lost a lot of talent, but Matt Grothe leads what will be one of the best offense’s in the conference and maybe the country.

24. Wake Forrest

Some questions marks on both lines, but the Demon Deacons may have the best combination of experience, talent, and coaching in the ACC.

25. Oklahoma State-

The Cowboys may have the talent to beef with the Big 12’s elite in 2008. The defensive front seven is the only thing holding back the Cowboys from a top 15 ranking in my eyes.

Top 10 Fantasy Football Running Backs

The Sports Muffin's Top 10 Fantasy Football Running Backs are listed below. We have also posted some additional Running Backs that may make your list, but not ours.

Top 10 Fantasy Football Running Backs

1. LaDainian Tomlinson
2. Adrian Peterson
3. Steven Jackson
4. Brian Westbrook
5. Joseph Addai
6. Frank Gore
7. Marion Barber III
8. Clinton Portis
9. Larry Johnson
10. Ryan Grant

Additional Running Backs:
Edgerrin JAmes
Jamal Lewis
Marshawn Lynch
Maurice Jones-Drew
Willis McGahee

Top 10 Fantasy Football Quarterbacks

Below is a list of the Top 10 Fantasy Football Quarterbacks according to the Sports Muffin. In addition we are listing some Quarterbacks that did not make our list, but may make yours.

Top 10 Fantasy Football Quarterbacks

1. Tom Brady
2. Peyton Manning
3. Tony Romo
4. Drew Brees
5. Ben Roethlisberger
6. Carson Palmer
7. Matt Hasselbeck
8. Jay Cutler
9. Donovan McNabb
10. Eli Manning

Additional Quarterbacks:
Aaron Rodgers
David Garrard
Jason Campbell
Phillip Rivers
Vince Young

Top 10 Major League Baseball Teams

Listed below are the Muffin's Top 10 Baseball Teams of 2008. Also listed below are additional teams that we left off the list.

Top 10 Major League Baseball Teams

1. Chicago Cubs
2. Boston Red Sox
3. Los Angeles Angels
4. Tampa Bay Devil Rays
5. Philadelphia Phillies
6. Oakland Athletics
7. Florida Marlins
8. New York Yankees
9. Arizona Diamondbacks
10. New York Mets

Additional Teams:
Baltimore Orioles
Chicago White Sox
Milwaukee Brewers
St. Louis Cardinals
Texas Rangers

Top 10 MMA Fighters Ranked List

Listed Below are the Top 10 MMA Fighters currently in the sport today from the Muffin. In addition I am listing additional fighters that you could potentially argue should be in the top 10 due to being a fan favorite or having actual talent.

1. Anderson Silva
2. Urijah Faber
3. Georges St. Pierre
4. Quinton "Rampage" Jackson
5. B.J. Penn
6. Miguel Torres
7. Antonoio Nogueria
8. John Fitch
9. Lyoto Machida
10. Takanori Gomi

Some additional fighters left off the list include:

Andrei Arlovski
Cung Lee
Diego Sanchez
Fedor Emelianenko
Joe Rogan
Randy Couture
Rich Clementi
Sean Sherk
Tim Sylvia
Wanderlei Silva

MISSING: Rich Harden

Something's up with Rich Harden. He should have hit the Disabled List by now. In fact, I'm pretty sure he had a Tommy John surgery scheduled for last week. But, instead of going under the knife, he dissected the San Francisco Giants to the tune of 6 innings, 1 hit, 2 walks, 0 runs, and 9 K's. Is this Rich Harden - the one who is on a current 7-consecutive games started streak - the same Rich Harden who hadn't made more than 5 consecutive starts since 2005?

Without Rich Harden single-handedly subsidizing the medical industry, expect the rest of us to foot the bill.

Dick Davey Joins Stanford Coaching Staff

BREAKING NEWS!!! Former Santa Clara University Men's Basketball head coach Dick Davey has signed on with Stanford Men's Basketball as an assistant coach. (Nevermind that this "Breaking News" actually broke yesterday. It's not like you knew about it.)

Dick Davey joins the Cardinal after serving as the Broncos head coach for 15 years, not to mention the 15 he spent before that as an assistant. Thanks to him, we have players like Steve Nash and....um....well, that's it....I guess Davey had something to do with Randy Winn choosing a baseball career over a basketball career. That's worth something, right? Besides - isn't a two-time NBA MVP good enough for you?!? Sheesh, tough crowd.

Besides being the winningest head coach in the West Coast Conference, Davey was best known for his fashionable argyle sweaters. No word on whether he'll be bringing his argyle wardrobe to the PAC-10.

I LOVE YOU, DICK!! Wait, that didn't sound so good.......

I Hate You, Bill Simmons

Dear Bill,

I hate you. I've never met you personally, you've never acted rudely toward me, you've never stolen from me, and you've never cut me off on the freeway. But I hate you.

It didn't used to be this way, though, Bill. I used to love you and your column, which I read religiously. You were the "everyfan." For those of us who were frustrated with our teams and the way they were managed, we could always turn to you as the voice of reason. After all, no one suffered more than you had. There was some kind of "street cred" about you. Those of us with losing teams took to you for comfort and that "I'm-not-alone-in-this-world" feeling.

"Everyfan"? Not anymore, Bill. You've abandoned us. Your teams go on to win Super Bowls, World Series, and, as of tonight, NBA Championships. "Street cred"? Revoked. You speak to us from your mansion in the hills, while the rest of us make do in cardboard boxes. Now, when we come to you with gripes about our own teams, "Let them win championships" you tell us. What's next, Bill, are you going to walk away from the World Series of Poker with a bracelet?

I'm sorry, Bill, I really am. We had a good thing going. But I hate you, now. You're just too successful for this loser.

Regretfully,
Oflarity

P.S. Who am I kidding? I'll still read your stuff. But I'll be gritting my teeth over every word. You'll be receiving my dentist's bill.

A Week of Comebacks

We've had a pretty incredible week of comebacks. The kind of comebacks that find themselves immediately on ESPN Classic. The kind of comebacks that either result in rioting celebration, or going to bed in tears - depending on which side of the comeback you land on. The kind of comebacks that see our collective blood alcohol content rise for one reason or another. So I've got a simple question here, but no simple decision. Which comeback was the best?

1. Celtics defeat the Lakers, 97-91 in Game 4 of the NBA Finals

"Rollercoaster" doesn't even begin to describe this game. The Lakers started off by setting an NBA Finals record for largest lead after the first quarter, outscoring the Celtics 35-14. The Lakers even expanded their lead to 25. But we all know what happened in the end - the Celtics turned the tables in the second half, outscoring Kobe & Co. 57-33 to take a 3-1 series lead. Even the 2007 New England Patriots feel sorry for the Lakers.

2. Turkey defeats Czech Republic 3-2 at Euro 2008

Read here to see what kind of comeback this was. With Euro 2008 elimination on the line, the Turks find themselves in a 2-0 hole after 75 minutes of play. Then they trim the score to 2-1 - good for them, nice show of effort. Then they score another goal to tie it up 2-2 - impressive, looks like we're going to penalty kicks to decide this one. And then, the Turks score AGAIN, to take the 3-2 lead - HOLY CRAP! Not to mention the Turks then had to play a man down for the last minute of play, and, oh yeah, that man was their goalkeeper.

3. Tiger Woods ties the lead at the U.S. Open, before winning the title

There aren't many "OHHHHHHH!!!!!" moments in golf. "OHHHHHHH!!!!!" moments happen when a guy like Ray Allen hits a huge three-pointer when his team needs it the most. But on the 72nd hole of the U.S. Open, Tiger Woods gave us the definition of an "OHHHHHHH!!!!!" moment when he sunk his putt to force what became a 19-hole playoff with Rocco Mediate. The thing about Tiger is, he wins even when he shouldn't win - kinda like Kimbo Slice. The only difference is, Tiger's matches aren't fixed.

4. The Lakers win games 5, 6 and 7 to come out of an unprecedented 1-3 hole to win the NBA Finals

OK, fine, this one hasn't happened yet. But when it does, it will be right alongside all the other comebacks on this list.

DH in the NL?

Chien-Ming Wang will be sidelined until September with an injury he suffered while running the bases during an interleague game in Houston. This injury has prompted criticism from Hank Steinbrenner and radio announcer JT "the Brick", and raises the question of whether or not the NL should adopt the DH rule and spare their pitchers from having to bat. Frankly, Yankee fans should just shut the hell up. You have more than 25 fricken World Series championships! You have the money to buy countless more as long as your idiot owner doesn't continue to screw it all up. The pitcher having to bat adds so much more strategy to the game of baseball. NL managers have to make the tough decisions concerning when to pinch hit for pitchers during tight games in late innings. AL managers have to scratch their asses until it's obvious their pitcher is getting rocked. You have to be a serious whiner to get your panties all bunched up over your pitcher having to run. If billions of people on this earth can run so can a godamn MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL PITCHER!!!

Holy Turk!

Today's Euro 2008 first round match between Turkey and the Czech Republic could have made a soccer fan out of anyone. Rarely do first round matches have such importance for both participating teams, as each side needed a win to move on to the Quarterfinals. The Czech Republic looked like the stronger team for 75 minutes as they built a 2-0 lead. Their goalie, Petr Cech, is considered one of the premier goalies in the world. The Turks, however, were not to be denied. They ended up scoring 3 goals in the final 15 minutes to pull out one of the most improbable comebacks in international soccer history. The Turks even lost their goalie to a red card in the final minutes and had to put a Forward into the goal. I feel like this comeback would be the equivalent of putting Mariano Rivera into a playoff game with a 6-0 lead in the ninth inning and him blowing it. These things just DO NOT HAPPEN! Without having an affiliation to any european teams I have to say I'll be rooting for the Turks here on out. Türkiye! Türkiye! Türkiye! Türkiye!

Would It Be Creepy If...

For those of us who are sports fans, we love sports. We love our teams. We love our players. We love our mascots. We love our cheerleaders. We love other teams' cheerleaders.

But there's a fine line between "fan" and "crazed, creepy fanatic." And, often times, you don't know you've crossed that line until somebody tells you. There's no substitute for good ol' American objectivity. So, with that said, help me out here - would it be creepy if...

...I had John Lackey's engagement photos as my computer desktop?

...I got my hair cut to look like Chris Kaman's?

...I named my first born son Nolan Urijah-LaDainian "Oflarity"?



...I named my first born daughter Rampagah Kingfish-Silva "Oflarity"?



...Someone suggests the Olive Garden for dinner, and I immediately fall to the floor in pain like my liver exploded?

...I wrote a love letter to Angels 2B Howie Kendrick?

...Instead of collecting the typical signed ball or card, I collected used socks?

...I used ping pong balls to make all of life's hard decisions?

...My roommate goes on and on about Tim Lincecum's "beautiful locks" - and I don't bat an eye?

...I told you I'd pay top dollar for a picture of Kevin Love made of macaroni?

Somebody Gonna Get Pregnant

I know, not sports-related. Sorry. But this is one of the Muffin's favorite interviews.

Chuck Liddell is getting married!

Move over Willa Ford Chuck Liddell found himself a new girly.


Former UFC light heavyweight champion Chuck Liddell is getting married. The name of the lucky girl is unknown but peep the pictures.

Props to combat lifestyle for the pics

My Action Figures are out dated!

I'll be having fictitious matchups between Anderson Silva and myself in no time...hopefully they have a referee figure so he can get Anderson Silva off me after I'm unconscious. So why are my action figures outdated?

Dana White recently announced that UFC action figures are coming next fall. I just spent $50 getting the only 4 US Action Figures for MMA I know of. Pictured below is a shot of the Tito Ortiz and the Randy Couture ones.


Anyone been watching The Ultimate Fighter this season? If so what the heck is up with Jesse Taylor who drinks so much that he tries to drown himself in the hot tub? They should give him a psych examine or at least take his three year old kid away from him. Yes you read it right someone bred with this guy...probably not willingly. He had money symbols etched into the back and sides of his head, claimed that when he drinks he becomes a monkey and proceeded to stomp all over the house with his bottle of vodka and finished the night submerged in the hot tub. He also vomited after winning his fight which was hilarious because I am sure Dana White probably smelled the booze on his breath and thought to himself nice the future winner of the show is a drunk with a three year old.

So what is on deck in the MMA world next week. Well we got the finale episode of the ultimate fighter show in which someone is getting thrown off the show and out of the UFC for breaking a limousine window. Nobody on the web knows who it is and if I was a betting man I'd say it was Jesse's 3 year old imitating Daddy when he goes on a bender. In addition we have the Ultimate Fighter Finale Live Saturday the 21st featuring the main event of Evan Tanner and Kendall Grove.

My buddy Will asked me what I know about Evan Tanner and I replied he used to be an alcoholic, his boat sunk while out at see while he was on it and he bet his fight purse from the Okami fight in vegas hoping to pay back his debts. I completely discredit him as a former champion...the sport was different then the talent was not as deep. Kendall is long and can not take a punch, but will Tanner even be able to hit him. Tanner against Okami looked slow and uncomfortable and I do not see that changing here. Both of these fighters BADLY need a win and I see Da Spyder finally pulling his crap together and getting a W.

Till next week.....

Boogity Boogity Boo!

Where to begin. First off let's visit the wild world of NASCAR and their resident elephant in the room.

If you're a race fan you'd have to be living in a cave somewhere to have not heard the latest brouhaha over one Mauricia Grant and her $225 million claim against NASCAR for "discrimination." Put simply she is claiming for 3 years she put up with sexual advances, racial taunts, slurs and general mistreatment. At first it seems plausible that these allegations are true, after all, we're talking about NASCAR. Home to rednecks, bumpkins and the dregs of the deep south right? Except we're also talking about the 21st century NASCAR. Sure the Billy Bob attitude is still there on some of the teams, but the sport's governing body itself, whom Mauricia worked for, has been refined over 2 decades by Wall Street, Hollywood, and Jeff Gordon. They're a corporation, a very big corporation now, and like all big companies they're more worried about the bottom line these days than anything else. This isn't an organization that primarily exists anymore for the pleasure of a few rum runners and their weekend adrenaline shot. Combine that with 3 years, count em, 3 that she worked for them supposedly taking this punishment, and it makes one wonder why she stayed long enough to be fired. Talk about having no self respect. Hell my 32 lb cat would have quit long before 3 years, probably leaving a big dookie on the floor on his way out. Come to think of it, so would I.

On to the Danica Patrick Racing League, I mean IndyCar. Man hard to remember that's what it's called with all the attention focused on the Queen herself. Don't know if anyone caught that "race coverage" the Deuce pumped out last weekend of an actually interesting race in Texas. Might have been hard after the tape delay so we could all watch the 1 hour of pre race and half hour of post race coverage of the NASCAR race (the lower tier Busch... er... Nationwide race that is). For a sport that's supposedly in the middle of this huge comeback from the 12 year OW split now that they've "merged" they sure are treated like the king of the hill by their own TV partner aren't they? I mean tape delayed coverage on a Saturday night that runs beyond midnight on the east coast and every five seconds cuts back to Danica Patrick who is competing for the lead... in 12th place. Seems like real progress to me. Nevermind that TV ratings have fallen at all but 3 races this year (I mean hell the Indy 500 was beaten on TV by reruns of reruns of American Idol's midweek behind the scenes special, "Greatest Spectacle in Racing" my ass). And after this mistreatment at the hands of ESPN all season long you think IndyCar would do something about it. Demand coverage commensurate with the supposed momentum the league has... but alas nothing coming out of Indiana except the sound of crickets. Which leave me to believe that either, they don't believe their own hype and they're not gaining any momentum, or that the IndyCar management are still inept and have lost their only scapegoat when Champ Car went under... Me thinks it's the latter.

And finally F1, all I have to say about them this week is to direct a comment at the Canadian Grand Prix officials.... get some freaking pavement you crazy "about" mispronouncing hosers.
You pay tens of millions in sanction fees to Bernie and his Nazi hooker loving pal Max, the least you can do is spring for some fresh asphalt for the only North American stop of the world's supposed top series. Hell the parking lot outside my apartment looks better than your supposed world class track.

NASCAR's in Michigan this week 2pm EDT on TNT, F1 and IndyCar are off.

Dontrelle Willis or Barry Zito?

Who would you want on your team? The man who signed a $126 million dollar deal only to currently reside at a 2 and 9 record or Dontrelle "I'm in Single A" Willis. Dontrelle I am not even sure needs any stats mentioned except a quote heard around Florida yesterday "Got to be the highest-paid pitcher in the history of A-ball". Some even refer to him now as the Suck Train or in reference to him being heavier "Freight Train"

Anyway which guy would you want on your team? I hate to say it I think I would take Barry Zito over Dontrelle Willis. At least the troops win here because I believe each pitcher donates $500 per walk...or wait was it strikeout?

The REAL Reason Dana White is Delaying

Farce - noun: A seasoned stuffing, as for roasted turkey.

By now, you may have heard that Dana White's huge, life-altering, cancer-curing, global warming-solving announcement originally scheduled for Thursday has been delayed until next week. So what's the hold up?

Here's my theory. I have no evidence to support it...yet. I've got monkeys working around the clock to find it. But anyway - I think this whole "huge announcement" business got out of hand, and it scared the crap out of Dana. So much so that he just rolled with it. When he first mentioned the big announcement, he was drunk, and like many drunks, he may have over-exaggerated (again, I don't have evidence of Dana's level of intoxication, but the monkeys will find it). But then the speculation began. Chuck v. Anderson Silva, a new TV deal, sale to Vince McMahon, an IPO - "Are you kidding me?!?", Dana said. "I can't top those!"

So what does he do? The same thing anyone does when they're caught in a lie they can't back up - he delays. And he'll keep delaying. And delaying. Until, everyone is so tired of him delaying that they just forget about it. AND THEN - the moment will be ripe for Dana to reveal that he and Brock Lesnar got matching tattoos.

Is Mixed Martial Arts Appropriate for TV?

Dana White defends MMA, but even he admits that CBS should not have aired the EliteXC fights.

Dana White and Vince McMahon to buy the UFC?

From what I've heard about Thursday it looks as though it will not be a dream match between Chuck Liddell and Andersen Silva, but instead Vince McMahon and Dana White buying the UFC from the Fertita Brothers. Why? How?

From what we gather at the muffin after the great TV ratings that awful Elite XC achieved Vince is shaking in his boots. WWE has been suffering dismal ratings lately...has anyone seen that they are giving away $1 million dollars on every episode of RAW? Take a look at their stock price.

So what is in it for Dana? Well the Fertitas initially bought the UFC and rolled it under the ZUFFA umbrella and elected Dana to be the president. They initially lost over 30 million dollars trying to save the UFC and have over the last few years watch the business explode into a cash cow, but what is next? Well I think Dana feels that with Vince being an investor he'll get better marketing, more doors for TV and possibly access to the holy grail an Initial Public Offering. I realize Dana has said repeatedly that he would not do a business where shareholders have a say in the fights he arranges and such but if he wants to sign fighters like Fedor and ensure they get ample Pay Per View buys for the event going IPO would give them a war chest of cash.

Also Vince holds exclusive rights to Madison Square Garden for any Sports Entertainment. I assume he plans on helping Dana get the UFC approved in New York and hopefully offer it exclusively agreement so Elite XC, Strikeforce or any of the other 2nd tier leagues do not step foot in New York.

I have my suspicions this deal will also not come to fruition for the sheer reason why would the Fertitas sell now unless they feel the business has peaked? They havent seen over one million buys since 2006 when Tito Ortiz fought Chuck Liddell and TUF ratings have been suffering year over year.

Personally myself and the muffin can not wait for Thursday.

Free Agent Zero

As expected, Gilbert Arenas decided to opt out of his contract with the Washington Wizards and will test free agency. Can't say I blame him, as now is as good a time as any to cash in - the talent pool for point guards seems alarmingly thin, yet teams are really starting to focus on this position.

Now, before people start saying that Gilbert Arenas isn't a true point guard, I understand Arenas has a shoot-first reputation - that he resembles Allen Iverson more than he does Steve Nash. But in the 2006-2007 season (before his injury-plagued 2007-2008 year), Arenas still averaged 6 assists per game. He did have an unspectacular 1.9 assists/turnover ratio, which was identical to LeBron James' that same year. However, to make up for it, he poured in 28.4 per game...OK, fine, maybe Arenas does resemble Iverson much more than he does Nash. That doesn't mean he can't be valuable running the point for someone.

But who? There's always the possibility (though I'd consider it unlikely) of returning to Golden State, should Baron Davis follow suit and opt out of his deal. Arenas could also find a home in Kobe Bryant's zip code, as the Clippers could certainly use a player of Arenas' caliber - not to mention, it would be nice a little incentive for Elton Brand to stick it out with his own contract.

I'm sure the Knicks would be interested (SHOCK!), but they might need both Alan Greenspan and Adam Smith to help them clear the cap room. Maybe the Sonics? Arenas, Jeff Green, and Kevin Durant seems like a nice little threesome, but I'm not sure Seattle/Oklahoma City is in a stable enough position to settle down with the high profile of Arenas. Perhaps Arenas could help the Heat forget that they'll likely miss out on Derrick Rose - but can Arenas and Dwyane Wade coexist?

Or, of course, Arenas could just sign a new contract with the Wizards, which he's indicated a willingness to do if they re-sign Antawn Jamison. But where's the fun in that?

Family Guy: Osama Bin Laden

This video was brought to my attention earlier today - apparently it was banned from TV. I know it has nothing to do with sports (except for a Dennis Rodman reference), but this was just too funny to pass up.

Family Guy Osama Bin Laden Clip (Banned from TV)

Ken Griffey Jr. Hits 600

Top of the 1st. 1 out. 1 runner on. 3 balls, 1 strike. 72 mph curveball, 14 inch break. 413 feet. Just a bunch of numbers. But they all led to the biggest number of all...#600.

On Monday evening, Ken Griffey Jr. joined the exclusive 600 Homerun Club. He's now among the likes of Willie Mays, Babe Ruth, and Hank Aaron (I guess I should also mention Sammy Sosa and Barry Bonds). Many expected The Kid to break Hank Aaron's record - especially after notching 438 homeruns by age 30. For comparison's sake, Barry Bonds only had 292 at the same age. It's really amazing to think what Griffey could have done had he remained healthy in recent years.

But all the coulda, woulda, shoulda's aside, 600 is still an amazing number and an amazing feat for a true class act.

Leon Powe is my hero!

Leon Powe was a dominant force in Game 2 of the NBA finals tonight as the Celtics cruised to victory against the Lakers. Powe's 21 points in 15 minutes sparked what should have been a rout had it not been for the Celtics' lack of concentration at the end which allowed the Lakers to pull within 2 at one point. Powe even got to the free-throw line almost twice as often as Kobe Bryant while playing less than half the time. Thankfully for Powe it looks like I wont have to watch Kobe's smug face lift the championship trophy. Well, at least he wont lift it in front of his home crowd. Thank you Leon Powe. You are truly my hero!

The Muffin Joins the Big Leagues

A couple changes to the Sports Muffin. First - we got our own domain name, shedding the "blogspot" tag. Now you can get all your Muffin goodness by directing your browser straight to www.thesportsmuffin.com. If you must, however, you can still use the "blogspot" tag, and you'll be redirected to the new address.

Also new - and a bit more noticeable - is the logo at the top of the page. Don't ask me why we're going with a muffin on a dead turkey body. You just have to admit, it works. There's a certain charm about it. Anyway, it comes to us thanks to the artistic efforts of Dewey over at Yardbarker.com.

Edit: I thought that was a dead turkey body. But I had my suspicions, and thought I would do a Google image search for "very fat woman." Sure enough - there she was.

UFC 88: Silva v. Liddell?

Rumors have been going around that middleweight champion Anderson "The Spider" Silva will move up to the light heavyweight class, and that he'll be tested from the get-go - landing a bombshell of a match against Chuck "The Iceman" Liddell this September in UFC 88. One word: WOW.

If this story is true, this could shape up to be an amazing fight. I'm kind of surprised Dana wouldn't ease Silva into the light heavyweight class - I'm not saying Silva should be handed cupcakes, because he'd likely roll over them just as easily as he's been doing in the middleweight class. But Silva-Liddell is a HUGE ticket to push - you don't want Silva coming out flat, trying to adjust to the different weight class. But, hey, if it happens, I'll definitely have my nose to the screen watching every bit of it. Maybe by then Comcast will have it in HD...

One other point to consider, is what the implications this fight will have for each fighter. I think Liddell has the most to lose here. He hasn't been the same since getting knocked out by Quinton "Rampage" Jackson. (Sidenote: say Silva beats Liddell, wins another light heavyweight fight or two, and lands a match against Rampage....I'm beginning to black out, just thinking about it....) After getting laid out by Rampage, Liddell lost in a decision to Keith Jardine, in a snoozer of a match. Liddell did bounce back and beat Wanderlei Silva, but it was by decision, and Liddell still doesn't seem to be on top of his game. A loss to Anderson Silva certainly wouldn't help matters any. And at the same time, as great a fighter as Silva is, he's fighting out of his weight class, so people may not give Liddell a whole lot of credit if he notches the win.

So what does Anderson Silva have to lose? Not a whole lot. He's proven he can dominate the middleweight class. Say he loses to Liddell - no big deal, no one can fault him for trying to challenge himself. He goes back to middleweight, continues to roll guys over, and waits until Urijah Faber puts on a few pounds and jumps over to the UF.................sorry, another blackout. But say Silva beats Liddell? He further solidifies his legacy as arguably one of the best fighters the sport has seen. He earns himself a bigger payday because there are more "stars" for him to fight in the light heavyweight class - Liddell, Rampage, Forrest Griffin, Wanderlei Silva, Rashad Evans, etc. All in all, I think Silva's got everything to gain in this matchup.

For more details about this rumored fight, check out MMAFrenzy.com

Milton Bradley My New Man Crush

Milton Bradley...you are named after the maker of Monopoly. Milton Bradley you argued with a mixture of umpires and players last year and in the process of shouting tore your ACL.



However after the last 5 games you have become my new man crush. Shhh dont tell my girlfriend but lately all I can think about is your insane average, your on base percentage leads the league at .449 and not to mention a fully healed ACL.

Your slugging percentage of .627 also beats Josh Hamilton for top spot. Sean has a man crush on Hamilton, but for this week he should start having an affair with you. I love your walks and enthusiasm when you get upset. The breaking of the bat over your knee is one of my favorites.



5 Homeruns in your last 5 games have given me a new reason to live.

I can not wait to see how our relationship progresses.

Chris Bosh On The Tonight Show With Jay Leno

Good stuff.

RIOS WATCH

Age 27 is supposed to be the breakout year for young sluggers, but for Alex Rios, it's been his breakDOWN year (HA!). Instead of building on his .297 average, 24 homeruns, and 85 RBI in 2007, the 2008 Rios carries just a .261 average with 3 homeruns and 24 RBI. That puts him on pace for just 8 homeruns and 65 RBI. This isn't the same Alex Rios the Blue Jays just signed to a 6-year extension for $64 million (or is that in loonie?)

Bye Bye, Flip...Hello, Avery?

Despite a 64-18 record (and an Eastern Conference Finals exit) in 2007-2008, the Detroit Pistons decided to part ways with Flip Saunders today. While with the Pistons, Saunders had 176 wins to only 70 losses, but lost in the Eastern Conference Finals each year. Apparently he couldn't quite stack up to his predecessor, Larry Brown, who made - and once won - the NBA Finals in two years as head coach.

Wouldn't it make sense for the Pistons to bring Avery Johnson on board? He brings the discipline of Larry Brown, but without the constantly changing mailing address. Like Flip Saunders before him, he knows how to win games in the regular season (264-194). However, also like Flip Saunders, Avery's had a hard time getting his team over the proverbial hump.

But wouldn't Avery be a better position to succeed in Detroit than he was in Dallas? I understand Dallas had a pretty good roster for a few years, but perhaps Avery's biggest problem was a big German who liked to disappear in big games. In Detroit, Avery's got a bunch of guys who come up big. Plus, the competition just isn't as fierce in the Eastern Conference as it is in the Western Conference (for now, at least). Detroit has a very good roster right now, and there's no reason they shouldn't be perennial contenders to represent the Eastern Conference in the Finals (though they will need some new blood sooner than later). Avery's the kind of guy who can light a fire under their asses and maybe get them over the hump that Saunders couldn't.